I may have lost the fight, but we won the war.

For the past couple of weeks it seems that Quentin and I have been in a power struggle. He seems to think that he can do everything by himself and any help that I try to give turns out to be a fight. In my child development class I am learning about Piaget's stages and Quentin is in between the autonomy vs. shame and doubt and the initiative vs. guilt stages. Learning about these stages has helped me to better understand my child. Last night Quentin was bound and determined to button the shirt of his pajamas all by himself. It was bedtime and I wasn't willing to wait while he did it, so we fought about it for about 10 minutes. I would try and put the shirt on him, but as soon as I did he would take it off before I could button it. So, I gave in and let him try to do it by himself, assuming that he would get frustrated soon and just let me do it. Well, there were four buttons on the shirt and he took about 5 minutes for each button. He was patient and determined to finish the job himself. I sat in his bedroom with him while he did it and encouraged him everytime he was getting it right and praised him when he got a button through. I cannot explain the joy that I felt in taking the time to praise my son for a job well done and for his glowing smile as he felt accomplished in buttoning up his own shirt. It was definitely a fight worth losing.